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These Omega Mart products prove that Meow Wolf’s surreal grocery store is unlike anything you’ve ever seen.
Photo by Atlas Media
Ever strolled through a grocery store and thought, "Wow, this is painfully normal"?
Enter your friendly and FAR-from-normal Omega Mart, where the mundane gets a technicolor, otherworldly makeover—and that's putting it lightly. Tucked inside Meow Wolf Las Vegas, this is no ordinary grocery store. No, this particular establishment is where reality takes a coffee break in the back, back, back room and lets weirdness run rampant throughout the aisles. The shelves are stocked with mind-bending products that make you question everything you thought you knew about shopping, snacking, and, well, existence.
What could seemingly be considered to be the end cap to end all end caps, the selections available to you and every other Omega Mart visitor are wonderfully bizarre. Alas, we're contractually obligated to only pick six of them. (Just kidding, there's no contract - we just would never be able to pick just one or two items.)
So, here are six of our favorite Omega Mart products that are so wild, you'll be wondering if you'll need a mental cleanup on Aisle 3.
Looking for a snack that defies logic? These Nut Free Salted Peanuts challenge everything you thought you knew about nuts. The container promises "100% salt" — and it delivers exactly that. Inside, you'll find no peanuts at all, making it the perfect snack for those who love peanuts but hate actually eating them.
It's a paradox in a can that leaves most shoppers scratching their heads and questioning their own relationship with logic, but for me — someone plagued with a severe peanut allergy — it's the perfect solution for when I'm feeling nutty.
What exactly constitutes a clam emergency? That's the question you'll ponder as you hold this mysterious tin. It’s better to have Emergency Clams on hand and not need them than need them and not have them, right?
The product label clearly states to not open them unless it's a real emergency — but the definition of a shellfish crisis remains woefully vague. Is it for times when you desperately need seafood? Or perhaps when regular fresh clams just won't do? Maybe you slept in and missed the early morning clamming tide? Whatever the reason, the mystery is part of the appeal, and the empty stash can might just come in handy for your own emergencies.
Bonus: This product contains no added sugars. That's always a plus, right?
When regular orange drinks just aren't cutting it (looking at you, Hi-C), reach for this special beverage that promises an experience beyond mere hydration. Sometimes called "Omega Mart Orange Plus" in the commercials, this citrus sensation comes with a side of interdimensional intrigue. The ingredients list might raise some eyebrows, but that's all part of the charm. Each sip is a journey into the unknown, though it's probably best to avoid asking about the secret formula.
That said, we are required to mention that if you've consumed any recently, please feel free to reach out to Omega Mart Consumer Affairs (1-800-808-4194) at your earliest convenience. It's probably nothing.
Step into the Omega Meat department, and you'll find yourself face-to-face with a product that puts the "cosmic" in cosmic cuisine. The Nebula Loaf glows with possibility (literally and figuratively) and promises a taste of the universe in every slice.
Is it actually meat? Is it made from stardust? At only $0.99 per pound, who cares! That’s a steal!
Don't let the name fool you — this isn't butter. It's not even trying to be butter. Instead, it's a home freshening spray that aggressively questions your dairy knowledge while making your living room smell surprisingly buttery. The bottle demands answers about your butter assumptions while infusing your linens with an intoxicating aroma that cuts through unpleasant odors like a knife through... well, you know.
Pro Tip: Not recommended for people who don't like the smell of microwavable popcorn.
This lemon-lavender sparkling water transcends traditional beverage categories. Each bottle contains refreshment with a side of existential introspection. The latest formula boasts being non-conforming and multi-purpose — though nobody's quite sure how any of that is measured or what it actually means. Available in the cooler section, this drink proves that even hydration can be an opportunity for self-discovery.
Want to experience these weird grocery store items for yourself? They're just a small taste of what awaits at Omega Mart. While some fake food items remain proudly displayed on store shelves, others have made their way into the Omega Mart merch collection, letting you take a piece of the impossible home with you.
Whether you're a curious shopper, an art enthusiast, or someone who's always wondered what "emergency clams" might taste like, Omega Mart delivers an experience that's equal parts amusing and high-quality. Visit Omega Mart at Meow Wolf Las Vegas, where the products you need may not always be what they seem, but the wonder is always real.
A little advice, though? When you spot that perfect item on the shelf, don't ask too many questions. Plus, sometimes, the best souvenirs are the ones that just make your friends and family ask, "Wait... what exactly did you bring home?"
